noun
- 1.firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.
"relations have to be built on trust"
Despite this, the way we use the word "trust" in our personal life journeys, there is no definition. We all know what it's like to have full trust in a person. But what about the inbetweens? What is enough trust? Oh, I trust this person enough for this, but not this. Sometimes, you're not even sure if you actually trust a person. Like, at all. You can spend years on end seeing and listening to a person, but when asked if you trust them? If so, why? Maybe you just do. Why? Because maybe they're always there. Maybe they brought you into this world and shaped your very being. Maybe because they ultimately have the final say on nearly everything until you learn to support yourself.
Parents, I'm looking at you.
No, this isn't meant to antagonize parents. It's the most difficult, stressful and uncharted job anyone could sign up for--or stumble into--and it's not my place as a teen to teach people how to parent. I'm simply here to point out something us teens deal with and rephrase it.
We want your trust. No, not the "oh, I think you're old enough to do this now!" We want your trust. And we want to give you ours. Actual conversations, ranging from talking about nothing, to rambling about our teenage emotions that tend to be oh so foolish to you. Comfort, love, security. The same thing we feel with a friend. Difference is, you're a guidance. You've been alive a few extra decades and can easily assist in navigating my ameture issues. So why not?
Instead of being listened to and picked up, so many of us find that you're not ready to listen to us. Either you refuse to understand that we're crossing realms between child and adult and so our problems will follow suit. Or the fact that we're still mostly undeveloped doesn't phase you and we should just grow up. No, I'm not asking for permission to constantly whine. But yelling at me every time I share a bit of myself that doesn't portray that perfect innocent child, really? And you expect us to go on to have a good relationship?
Really, this goes for anyone, no matter who you're talking to. If you want to build a decent level of trust between the two of you, respect and listen to them. Allow them to open up, share who they are, and never judge. Be a guide where it's needed and a shoulder when there're tears. In return, do the same. Share what your comfortable sharing, and avoid the "secretive and cool" trope. Friendship--or any kind of relationship--requires honesty. It's on that base that familiarity is developed and trust is established.
From there, love--platonic or romantic--can grow.
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